Why I NEVER believed in Santa
One of my favorite things that we did in New York City was visiting Santa in Macy's. I have never in my life had my picture taken with Santa. One year I dressed up like Santa (complete with a toilet paper beard) and my friend Jodi and her sister Tonya had their picture taken with me. But as a child I never did this. We didn't believe in Santa as kids because our parents didn't LIE to us. This got me into a lot of trouble each year until about third grade, because I felt it was my civic duty to inform all the other children they were believing a lie. Each year, my teacher (Mrs. Beabout, Mrs. Strain, Mrs. Slankard) would take me outside the classroom and ask me kindly not to ruin all the other children's lives by being truthful. Anyway, visiting Santa was an exciting new experience for me.
Macy's had a very cute area to walk through with all kinds of wonderful Christmas scenes and little elves who were kind enough to pose for pictures with us. As you will notice, Dr. Kevin, our friend and Tanya's personal hero, joined us. Really, he is the one who wanted to see Santa so badly.
Poor Karl, he hates shopping and being in stores. He is smiling on the outside, but thinking about Joe Torre on the inside. Later, Tanya and I were saying that this was our favorite part of the day. Karl still had to say that Joe Torre was his favorite part.
This was when things started to get creepy. Santa just kept rubbing my arm.
Kevin looks like he's having a great time, doesn't he. Santa had a special little bench for him to sit on. As we walked out of the magical winter wonderland, we turned to see lots of other areas, with what looked like OTHER SANTAS! Karl asked the elf what was going on behind those secret curtains, and she said it was just her home. Aaahh...the season of lies.
posted by gretchenjohnson @ 2:17 PM
16 Comments:
I love it!
i got to get you a pony and a piano
who said that there were 12 other santas here? that's a lie! i'm the only santa
please don't have a fire going in your fireplace on Dec 24th, please i beg you...
my wife told me we lost our fire insurance
did you know Santa spelled differently is Satan?
the first house on my list is Marcia, where in the world is she?
Marcia is still at the Today show next to the scary lady who stares at you (kevin or karl, i don't know which)
you smell like beef and cheese
you sit on a throne of lies
BAH HUMBUG!!!! I HATE CHRISTMAS!!!
1. Gretchen, your teachers sound like characters from Harry Potter.
2. There is definitely something creepy about that one picture. Tanya looks like she's going to try to make a break for it.
3. When Karl mentioned other Santas, those elves got belligerent. I heard one of them say it was going to come after him. I think all of their smiles conceal a deep, uncontrolled anger.
remember when i saluted the soldier and thanked him for his service?
elf
No, but I do remember when Ilea saluted the crossing guard in McGee and Me.
it was a toy soldier at fao schwartz
now i remember. You are silly.
we need to have a thanksiving 05 reunion in nyc soon. please it's been so long
we got to get the gang back together
al, matt, katie, joe torre, the cable movie guy, the lady who is playing a man who became a lady in that one movie, and the lady with the evil eyes
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